This feels like our first normal week. Adjusting has been interesting to say the least. Not because she has been a difficult child at all. In fact, I couldn't ask for a more chill and accommodating baby. She will cry, but it seriously feels like she is just reasoning with you and saying, "I'm hungry" or tired. It is very consolable (and a very cute cry). She has yet to display a fussy period of the day. She seems fine with our noisy house and just goes with the flow.
It is my two and a half year old that has been my challenge. I was not expecting that at all. I was prepared for a fussy baby, but not a strange toddler phase. Seth has been more high maintenance to say the least these days. It has been challenging knowing how to help him mourn the loss of his being the only child. He has been so much more pouty and sad lately, mostly because he knows that it causes a scene and we will come running and asking what is wrong. He has very sweet and tender moments too, but I am challenged with how to deal with the pouty and more defiant Seth. Has anyone else gone through this?? Being a mom is a very emotional job. I go to bed every night wondering how to do better the next day and assessing what happened good and not so good this day. I love both my babies so much and am learning how to meet the needs of both. Keep your fingers crossed for me:) that we grow out of this phase soon.
8 comments:
When Lily was born I gave Owen as many helping jobs as I could. He would hold the new diaper while I changed her, get her blanket for her, stuff like that. One of his jobs that he was really into was "making Lily happy." When he hung out by her and she wasn't crying I'd really talk this one up. He also has always loved to read, so while I was nursing Lily I would grab a stack of books so Owen got some special Mom-time too. Good luck. I hope you get through it soon.
Jack went through this when Evelyn was born. So I tried to have a little special one on one time with him while she was napping and out of the way. It seemed to help. Yes, it can be a tough transition for a little while.
Poor Seth:( It must be hard not being the only kid anymore! My kids never seemed to have that issue luckily. I think all you can really do is involve him and give him lots of love (WHICH I AM SURE YOU DO). I think it'll just take time. Let me know if there's anything I can do. Maybe Seth could come play with Tyson:)
Let's just say I'll be calling YOU shortly after I have my baby - Jenika - what do I do with Taya??! Is this normal??!!
:)
I'm sorry - that sounds really hard, and like it would be hard to know what to do.
This is an article I thought was more in depth than some of the others I've seen on preparing the first child: you may have heard it all, but here it is just in case you're interested!
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0816/is_1993_Oct/ai_14690344/
You may have done this too, but typing in 'Big Brother' on amazon.com, looking for kids books that help with the transition - there are lots of cute books on the topic.
Good luck! We'll be praying for you!
My comment that I left on your last post, I believe, explains some of the hard times I had with this, but mostly it will take a little time and it really is the best thing for them (and you!) in the long run. Pretty soon they will be entertaining each other and learning very valuable lessons about sharing and not being the center of attention all the time. I really like the book "Siblings without rivalry" by Faber & Mazlish. Best of luck! Get some sleep! I'm sure you're doing the best job.
You are a great mother Jenika, it will all work itself out, one day at a time, no matter what!
The same exact thing happened to my sweet little Apollo when Annie was born. My friend sent me "The Power of Positive Parenting" and it made a huge difference. It was like my bible with both kids for awhile and I have lent it out to a lot of people. It's by Dr. Lathem. I'm glad your little one is so sweet.
So, this post broke my heart and also set fear in it, at the same time...that is my biggest fear of expanding our family (I'm not preggers or anything)...how hard it would be on Max...I'll bet you are doing an excellent job..I can't imagine you being anything less than an amazing mom!!!
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